Monday, February 28, 2005
Rounding Third
Today I officially hit the third trimester of my pregnancy. It is truly something that I never thought I'd ever experience. I know I'm not out of the woods yet, but if I can just get a little closer to home plate, I bet I can slide the last few feet if needed. Hopefully I won't need to slide, 'cause that just ruins a decent pair of pants.
Sunday, February 27, 2005
Getting ready
Well, today we are cleaning out the n-room, and we have quite a job ahead of us. Originally, this room was always referred to as my office. It had a desk, bookcase, filing cabinet- all the good office things. Did I use it as an office? No. But it was mine, dammit, and I can call it anything I like.
It was becoming a hobby room until we decided that the finished attic was a much better location for that because we could leave our projects out and not have to worry about looking at the clutter. As an added bonus, the attic is big enough that we each have half of the room and can work there {gasp} together. So, to the attic went the desk, as it makes a lovely station for my many hobbies.
In the meantime, my office became the place for all things extra. Extra furniture, extra shoes, extra blankets, extra clothes. The place is a bit of a mess, as you might imagine. And today, we get out the shovels and get it cleared out so that "we" (meaning A, of course) can paint.
Next week we are actually heading out to IKEA to buy everything but the crib. I know, "we" won't have the room painted by then, but it's a good day for the trek to that store, and when it is finally painted, we (yes, including me this time- I'm a whiz with those little allen wrenches) can waste no time getting things set up. My folks are getting us the crib, and hopefully we'll have that in hand and assembled by the end of March. Pictures will follow (as soon as I figure out how to post them- not the Web savvy one am I).
I suppose there's no time like the present to get this bad boy in motion. I'm hoping that perhaps in the far corner of the room I might find the bermuda triangle of socks. Somehow, I have at least 10 pair of black socks with no mate. 10! Something is definitely fishy.
It was becoming a hobby room until we decided that the finished attic was a much better location for that because we could leave our projects out and not have to worry about looking at the clutter. As an added bonus, the attic is big enough that we each have half of the room and can work there {gasp} together. So, to the attic went the desk, as it makes a lovely station for my many hobbies.
In the meantime, my office became the place for all things extra. Extra furniture, extra shoes, extra blankets, extra clothes. The place is a bit of a mess, as you might imagine. And today, we get out the shovels and get it cleared out so that "we" (meaning A, of course) can paint.
Next week we are actually heading out to IKEA to buy everything but the crib. I know, "we" won't have the room painted by then, but it's a good day for the trek to that store, and when it is finally painted, we (yes, including me this time- I'm a whiz with those little allen wrenches) can waste no time getting things set up. My folks are getting us the crib, and hopefully we'll have that in hand and assembled by the end of March. Pictures will follow (as soon as I figure out how to post them- not the Web savvy one am I).
I suppose there's no time like the present to get this bad boy in motion. I'm hoping that perhaps in the far corner of the room I might find the bermuda triangle of socks. Somehow, I have at least 10 pair of black socks with no mate. 10! Something is definitely fishy.
Friday, February 25, 2005
Wednesday, February 23, 2005
Random Thoughts
My brain is rather fried with a huge work project, but I offer a few random thoughts…
…on pulling in a bit too much air
As I returned from lunch today (it was a lovely bean and cheese burrito if you must know), I encountered a pair of people in conversation on the elevator. I generally ignore what is being said but could not help overhearing this woman obviously and loudly sucking up to the man with whom she was speaking. People like this make me absolutely crazy. When I reached my floor, I fled the elevator quickly for fear that the vacuum created within that small space would surely extract my fetus.
…on doing things one step at a time
Now that I am obviously pregnant, people keep asking me when I’ll be having another. Excuse me? I haven’t even had one yet!
…on desk toys
Why is it that we feel compelled to decorate our offices with funny little trinkets? I’m guilty, too, as I have a whole collection of things here and there. My favorite is the Toadster- a silver toad with two pieces of nicely browned bread poking up from its back. If you like frogs and toads, there is a whole collection of this stuff here. I’m not really big on frogs/toads but couldn’t resist this one. What stupid little thing do you have at your desk?
…on pulling in a bit too much air
As I returned from lunch today (it was a lovely bean and cheese burrito if you must know), I encountered a pair of people in conversation on the elevator. I generally ignore what is being said but could not help overhearing this woman obviously and loudly sucking up to the man with whom she was speaking. People like this make me absolutely crazy. When I reached my floor, I fled the elevator quickly for fear that the vacuum created within that small space would surely extract my fetus.
…on doing things one step at a time
Now that I am obviously pregnant, people keep asking me when I’ll be having another. Excuse me? I haven’t even had one yet!
…on desk toys
Why is it that we feel compelled to decorate our offices with funny little trinkets? I’m guilty, too, as I have a whole collection of things here and there. My favorite is the Toadster- a silver toad with two pieces of nicely browned bread poking up from its back. If you like frogs and toads, there is a whole collection of this stuff here. I’m not really big on frogs/toads but couldn’t resist this one. What stupid little thing do you have at your desk?
Friday, February 18, 2005
DBTs
I believe it was Tertia who coined the term DBTs (dead baby thoughts). She suffered from them quite a bit, and many other pregnant infertiles joined the ranks. I must admit that I am there, too. One of the most glorious things that I have experienced thus far in my life is feeling the little kicks I get from the babe within. And one of the most horrifying things is when I think that it's been too long since I've felt a kick, or the kick I felt wasn't very strong, and so on. The building up to the DBTs.
Part of me says that it is completely normal to have these fears. I look back at other blog entries and think- see, they had the DBTs, too. I feel comforted for just a moment until another part of my conscious chimes in with but what if it was ok for them and NOT for you? Then you're just ignoring some critical warning signs. The back and forth is enough to drive me mad. And when I just get to the verge of calling the doctor with my concerns on having not felt much movement in a given day or two, the wee one will go full throttle into kicking, making me feel like a fool. And making me smile ear to ear at the same time.
I wish so much that I could just be of the naive group- those who assume without question that their pregnancy will be compeletely carefree. That they will never have reason to worry. That would be nice. But that part of me died after going through so much negative and so much gone wrong with infertility. My body wasn't working properly then, why the hell would it work properly now?
I must seem very detatched from this pregnancy to outside observers. The scary truth is that I am so attached that I fear the destruction of me if anything were to go wrong. I've been lucky, blessed, charmed, whatever term you choose- I have had a relatively uneventful pregnancy. I feel healthier than I ever have before. My aches and pains are minimal. I should be shouting praises from the hilltops- instead I cower in the valley caves and hope that I can just wait this thing out a little while longer.
Only 14.5 weeks to go- I can make that with my sanity intact, right?
Part of me says that it is completely normal to have these fears. I look back at other blog entries and think- see, they had the DBTs, too. I feel comforted for just a moment until another part of my conscious chimes in with but what if it was ok for them and NOT for you? Then you're just ignoring some critical warning signs. The back and forth is enough to drive me mad. And when I just get to the verge of calling the doctor with my concerns on having not felt much movement in a given day or two, the wee one will go full throttle into kicking, making me feel like a fool. And making me smile ear to ear at the same time.
I wish so much that I could just be of the naive group- those who assume without question that their pregnancy will be compeletely carefree. That they will never have reason to worry. That would be nice. But that part of me died after going through so much negative and so much gone wrong with infertility. My body wasn't working properly then, why the hell would it work properly now?
I must seem very detatched from this pregnancy to outside observers. The scary truth is that I am so attached that I fear the destruction of me if anything were to go wrong. I've been lucky, blessed, charmed, whatever term you choose- I have had a relatively uneventful pregnancy. I feel healthier than I ever have before. My aches and pains are minimal. I should be shouting praises from the hilltops- instead I cower in the valley caves and hope that I can just wait this thing out a little while longer.
Only 14.5 weeks to go- I can make that with my sanity intact, right?
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
Valentine Geek
In general, I am not a big fan of Valentine’s Day. It is far too much of a Hallmark holiday, and I tend to avoid making romantic gestures on that day. Now, if someone pays me to make romantic gestures, that’s a whole other story (wink, wink).
Ok, really, I’m not going down that road- get your damn head out of the gutter.
What I’m trying to relay is how I spent my Valentine’s Day- riding around in a car with three other women delivering singing valentines. Yes, Virginia, it’s true- I sing barbershop. And I love it. Every year I look forward to taking the day off to drive around like a crazy person making other people very happy. It’s a great way to spend the day. Yesterday was no exception.
If you are a romantic at heart and want something great to give your sweetie next year, consider supporting your local barbershoppers. It’s a hit at the office, doesn’t cost as much as roses, and won’t stay on your hips like chocolate.
Ok, really, I’m not going down that road- get your damn head out of the gutter.
What I’m trying to relay is how I spent my Valentine’s Day- riding around in a car with three other women delivering singing valentines. Yes, Virginia, it’s true- I sing barbershop. And I love it. Every year I look forward to taking the day off to drive around like a crazy person making other people very happy. It’s a great way to spend the day. Yesterday was no exception.
If you are a romantic at heart and want something great to give your sweetie next year, consider supporting your local barbershoppers. It’s a hit at the office, doesn’t cost as much as roses, and won’t stay on your hips like chocolate.
Friday, February 11, 2005
Pregnancy Update
24w4d
I had a good appointment this morning. The heartbeat is nice and strong at 140bpm. I am measuring a little bit ahead, but not too much. I should have measured 24cm for 24 weeks, but given that I'm actually 24.5 weeks, and the fact that my 19w ultrasound puts me another two days ahead of that, I figure it's about normal that I measured 26cm.
The did find trace protein in my urine, but were not alarmed beyond sending me to have a urine culture. Since my OB's office is in the hospital, that means getting a scrip, going to another wing of the hospital, and peeing in another cup. Fine. With my blood pressure completely normal range and minimal swelling in my ankles, I'm not worried that this spells trouble, but I will be happy to have a clean second pee-cup.
In two weeks I go for the one hour glucose test. Oh, boy.
I had a good appointment this morning. The heartbeat is nice and strong at 140bpm. I am measuring a little bit ahead, but not too much. I should have measured 24cm for 24 weeks, but given that I'm actually 24.5 weeks, and the fact that my 19w ultrasound puts me another two days ahead of that, I figure it's about normal that I measured 26cm.
The did find trace protein in my urine, but were not alarmed beyond sending me to have a urine culture. Since my OB's office is in the hospital, that means getting a scrip, going to another wing of the hospital, and peeing in another cup. Fine. With my blood pressure completely normal range and minimal swelling in my ankles, I'm not worried that this spells trouble, but I will be happy to have a clean second pee-cup.
In two weeks I go for the one hour glucose test. Oh, boy.
Wednesday, February 09, 2005
Buying in bulk
So, if you've ever gone to one of those big warehouse stores you find that you are immediately overwhelmed by the possiblity of having things like six pounds of peanut butter in one container, 20 pounds of rice, and so on... We actually belong to one of those clubs and try very hard to avoid going there because we will buy so many things (in bulk) that we really don't need. Last night was a great example. We went to said store for the purpose of buying guacamole for a dinner gathering this weekend. Now, before you flog me repeatedly for misuse of avocados, please understand that I live where the snow falls regularly, avocados cost more than a house, and finding decent guacamole anywhere is a miracle. When I lived in sunny California, I never settled for anything but fresh avocado guac- but those days are gone. However, they happen to have a not-too-bad version at the club store. Ok, mission accomplished.
I also decided that we should get a huge bottle of Dreft as I already had some hand-me-down baby clothes that could be washed and put away to make one less thing to do later. That is to be found no more- rats. Ok, maybe they would have some of those wonderful candied nuts we bought last time (and were very good about eating slowly)- nope, strike two.
However, into our cart did abound tortilla chips, veggie chips, guacamole, taquitos (appetizers for the weekend), salad dressing, and ice cream (the good stuff with the vanilla specks in it). As we got to the check-out I realized that we had not one piece of nutritious food in the whole cart.
No wonder they call it bulk food.
I also decided that we should get a huge bottle of Dreft as I already had some hand-me-down baby clothes that could be washed and put away to make one less thing to do later. That is to be found no more- rats. Ok, maybe they would have some of those wonderful candied nuts we bought last time (and were very good about eating slowly)- nope, strike two.
However, into our cart did abound tortilla chips, veggie chips, guacamole, taquitos (appetizers for the weekend), salad dressing, and ice cream (the good stuff with the vanilla specks in it). As we got to the check-out I realized that we had not one piece of nutritious food in the whole cart.
No wonder they call it bulk food.
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
As seen on my calendar today-
Is it possible that I am so busy doing that I no longer have time to enjoy being?
-Wilson
-Wilson
Monday, February 07, 2005
Still here!
I've been a bad blogger- bad, bad, bad. Neglecting my blog like that pile of laundry in my basement that threatens to soon crawl away on its own.
For the most part, I haven't had a lot to say recently. Part of it has also been a sadness I feel as I see a great division forming in the infertility community. As has been mentioned on other blogs, when a group becomes large, there are always subdivisions that result. I know this is a fact of life. In fact, I should tread carefully because although I have been a reader and commenter for quite a long time, I never got around to actually authoring a blog until I became one of those pregnant infertiles. A state that is frightening and joyful all in the same breath.
I know that this will all work itself out, but right now I am in one of those emotionally vulnerable states (hormonally triggered, of course) so I tend to overreact to everything.
As I compose a more interesting post, I wish everyone health, happiness, and the pursuit of parenthood.
For the most part, I haven't had a lot to say recently. Part of it has also been a sadness I feel as I see a great division forming in the infertility community. As has been mentioned on other blogs, when a group becomes large, there are always subdivisions that result. I know this is a fact of life. In fact, I should tread carefully because although I have been a reader and commenter for quite a long time, I never got around to actually authoring a blog until I became one of those pregnant infertiles. A state that is frightening and joyful all in the same breath.
I know that this will all work itself out, but right now I am in one of those emotionally vulnerable states (hormonally triggered, of course) so I tend to overreact to everything.
As I compose a more interesting post, I wish everyone health, happiness, and the pursuit of parenthood.
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